for my 21st birthday,
I don’t really want much anything, not
the drinks and the food and not even the more thoughtfully procured books and mugs, I mean they mean a lot-every text and every card and every celebration but
I don’t really want any of it;
for my birthday, maybe
I’d like just a space, safe and empty of everything but being,
body-less and memory-less and me-less being,
just a silence and a touch,
a resemblance to home, to other things I’ve always wanted
I just want to rest a little, slight break from all this frenzied living,
I never quite caught the gist of it and it’s really hard, honestly,
I’d just like someone to discover the hole housed in my heart,
watch them recoil with horror, gasp out
does it hurt?
and then, I’d like to answer-
Yes, it does. Very much.